I can't say much about my New Year's Eve this year, only that it isn't exactly (or even a little bit) like I had planned it to be.
This night has never been a happy one for me, and being the eternal optimist that I am, it's hard for me to admit that.
Tonight, although skewed in plan, is clear in purpose, and has given me the gift of a broadened perspective (and you know there's nothing I love more than perspective). In short, I have been reminded of all the reasons I have to be nothing but abundantly thankful for all that I have.
We are adamant in our ritual to reflect on this night, and the changing of the calendar has come to symbolize more than the beginning of a new day, month, or even year.
Our western society permits us the hyper notion that THIS year, THIS new calendar may provide us opportunities which surpass all those of years past. It is a time when we ponder the possibilities, whether positive or negative, of the twelve months to come.
2012 wasn't without its ups and downs, as I'm sure was the case for all of us, but given how I've found myself spending the last few hours of this now aged year, I can't say that the downs matter even a little. Spare of course, the lessons they so graciously taught.
This year I took risks and seized opportunities, I made one of the most difficult decisions of my years, and in turn I tasted the sweetness of my very own life again. I bought my first new car, took my first motorcycle ride, owned (and regretfully laid to a peaceful rest) my first pet, spent a day on a lake, and saw The Boss in concert.
I cried harder than I ever have, and found the deepest meaning in the worst sorrow.
I laughed with my whole heart, and loved with it, too. I nourished my soul with knowledge, experience, wonderful people, and a glass or two of Pinot.
I wouldn't change any of it, because there's nothing more precious and substantial than when life unfolds, unhindered, exactly as it is supposed to.
I wish the very best for all of you in 2013, and by the best, I mean laughter and tears, good times and bad, because life needs a healthy fusion of everything it can offer to be the very best it can be.
Wishing you lots of love with minutes to midnight,
A Fabulous State
Monday 31 December 2012
Saturday 8 December 2012
"I Always Tell Myself the Truth"
I can't count the number of times I've heard that little voice inside my head. Not my conscious, and no, I'm not schizophrenic, but the voice that tells me the truth. We all have one. It is unyielding and honest, and I often ignore it in my crusade to taste as much life as I can. The little voice is flawed only in that it doesn't necessarily tell us what is best for us, only what isn't. If you've heard this little voice, you've probably wondered how to explain it, or why you refuse to listen to it. Here's my perspective on the humanism in our little voices, and how they afford us a shrouded compassion to remind us that there's beauty in every breakdown. Enjoy!
(P.S Clicking on the photo will enlarge it for easier reading, imagine that!)With Love,
-A Fabulous State
Sunday 19 August 2012
Pretty Paper, Pretty Ribbons, All You.
It's really not accurate, nor is it human to say "I don't care what people think". To some extent, we all do, because if we didn't, we'd be absent of some very integral feelings (not to mention conversations) that are included as bonus prizes in the neatly wrapped gift box that is life. Something to strive for, in contrast, is to care as little as possible. Now, there's a real goal.
If you're someone who has managed to broaden their own perspective horizons despite rigidly placed social constructs, I congratulate you (your gift box no doubt has very pretty wrapping paper). If you're still scrambling like a mouse through a maze within some prison that has been built concretely to hold you within the boundaries of what this world wants you to believe, then let me allow you and your soul an escape route. You've got pretty paper, too, you've just got to learn to wrap the box.
A glowing fact of life is that people will always talk. Whether with praise or disapproval, it is a basic human instinct to validate ourselves through the medium of others. Unfortunately the well of praise tends to run dry at the hands of someone else's thundercloud (how's that for irony?). Your life, sadly, will always be someones (probably several someones) punching bag, but your own significance lies within how much you decide to bruise from the blows.
There is a sweet little place buried deep in your mind, where you rise above the hooks and jabs and simply decide that your own happiness and growth is worth more. Never stop searching for that place, even after you've found it, because the little bugger likes to fumble around, and so there's always more of "it" to find. Each time you unlock another little piece of that place, you become a more beautiful, intelligent, expanded, and experienced person than you were before. Looking for the "secret of life"? You're welcome.
At my high school graduation, myself and a classmate read a comedic speech aimed at all the quirks our various teachers had, our theater arts teacher was quoted with one of her own personal favorites (which we managed to get the entire class to retort in sync, pretty impressive if I do say so myself). The quote was by Eleanor Roosevelt, and it goes: "Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people." If you had asked me then, at seventeen, if I'd be laying in bed at twenty two recounting that quote and its significance in a blog post, I would have said, "No b'y". The quote speaks volumes, but even the greatest minds engage themselves in a gossip laden, bitterness sprinkled spew of tiny minded jabber from time to time.
If your every anxiety stems from over thinking and agonizing every little decision you fear judgement from, please stop, now. Life is short, don't be so foolish. There's nothing a small mind loves to talk about more than YOUR perceived lack of morality. Hold on to your hats, kids, because there's no bumpier ride than a journey over the roads of morality. What immediately determines whether or not your morality is questionable? Why, who've you've had sex with of course! Naturally, that determines your place in the proverbial heaven or hell which exists in the minds of others (don't forget, God's watching too) because surely there's no greater crime in this world than satisfying a biological instinct that you're born with. There is a time and a place for every relationship you experience in this lifetime, don't let anyone tell you differently. The only morality to be concerned with is the one that feeds your own worth; the morality you learn from lending your love to others, or from easing pains with a conscious presence and an open heart.
Nobody knows your love or your life, your memories or your pains, and in the purest fashion of logic, it's just preposterous to think you can judge someone if you don't know those things. Even if you do, greater still are the accompanying feelings and individual differences which account for just how and why everyone experiences an "experience" as they do. If that sounds complicated, it's because it is, so stop thinking you can lay out flat lined "facts" which encompass the whole story in a cookie cutter fashion. You can't. Worry about fighting your own battle, because that's the one that deserves the bulk of your attention, and it's the one which yields the most virtuous rewards.
When you're hurt by someone's words or actions, there is a tiny ribbon you can hold in your palm, it is small and sometimes fragile, and it can be whatever color you want it to be, but what is most important is that the tiny ribbon leads to a whole spool of ribbon. That spool is your life, and there's plenty of ribbon for all your years. That's the ribbon that fits snugly around the corners of the gift box that is your existence, holding the pretty paper in place. It's also the ribbon that caresses the corners of the gift boxes you give other people just as snugly. That ribbon is patterned with all the amazing people you should intentionally surround yourself with, and further decorated by all the substance and beauty that is you. Don't ever stop giving gifts of support, of love, of compassion, and open mindedness. Remember that you are greater, and definitely happier, than someone who has to expel their own energies in an attempt to make you look or feel bad. Even if you HAVE done something bad, be great enough to own up to it, and realize that the mistakes you make are one of the greatest reservoirs of growth in your life. Don't be afraid to cut some corners of your ribbon ever now and then, either. Every experience has a lesson or two (if not fifty) packaged within it. It's like your birthday, or Christmas: you get to tear away the paper vigorously, and be really excited to keep what's inside the box forever.
To "wrap" this up, I revert back to Mrs. Roosevelt's statement by saying that you should permit your mind to be small only in the most limited amounts, for it is far too great of a mind to waste its thoughts on discussing the affairs of others. If you don't believe that for yourself, then rest assured that I believe it for you. Besides, you should be out there mingling in your own affairs, that's where you'll lose the more burdensome ideal of morality, and find all the most pleasurable indulgences.
Happy (Un)Wrapping!
-A Fabulous State
If you're someone who has managed to broaden their own perspective horizons despite rigidly placed social constructs, I congratulate you (your gift box no doubt has very pretty wrapping paper). If you're still scrambling like a mouse through a maze within some prison that has been built concretely to hold you within the boundaries of what this world wants you to believe, then let me allow you and your soul an escape route. You've got pretty paper, too, you've just got to learn to wrap the box.
A glowing fact of life is that people will always talk. Whether with praise or disapproval, it is a basic human instinct to validate ourselves through the medium of others. Unfortunately the well of praise tends to run dry at the hands of someone else's thundercloud (how's that for irony?). Your life, sadly, will always be someones (probably several someones) punching bag, but your own significance lies within how much you decide to bruise from the blows.
There is a sweet little place buried deep in your mind, where you rise above the hooks and jabs and simply decide that your own happiness and growth is worth more. Never stop searching for that place, even after you've found it, because the little bugger likes to fumble around, and so there's always more of "it" to find. Each time you unlock another little piece of that place, you become a more beautiful, intelligent, expanded, and experienced person than you were before. Looking for the "secret of life"? You're welcome.
At my high school graduation, myself and a classmate read a comedic speech aimed at all the quirks our various teachers had, our theater arts teacher was quoted with one of her own personal favorites (which we managed to get the entire class to retort in sync, pretty impressive if I do say so myself). The quote was by Eleanor Roosevelt, and it goes: "Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people." If you had asked me then, at seventeen, if I'd be laying in bed at twenty two recounting that quote and its significance in a blog post, I would have said, "No b'y". The quote speaks volumes, but even the greatest minds engage themselves in a gossip laden, bitterness sprinkled spew of tiny minded jabber from time to time.
If your every anxiety stems from over thinking and agonizing every little decision you fear judgement from, please stop, now. Life is short, don't be so foolish. There's nothing a small mind loves to talk about more than YOUR perceived lack of morality. Hold on to your hats, kids, because there's no bumpier ride than a journey over the roads of morality. What immediately determines whether or not your morality is questionable? Why, who've you've had sex with of course! Naturally, that determines your place in the proverbial heaven or hell which exists in the minds of others (don't forget, God's watching too) because surely there's no greater crime in this world than satisfying a biological instinct that you're born with. There is a time and a place for every relationship you experience in this lifetime, don't let anyone tell you differently. The only morality to be concerned with is the one that feeds your own worth; the morality you learn from lending your love to others, or from easing pains with a conscious presence and an open heart.
Nobody knows your love or your life, your memories or your pains, and in the purest fashion of logic, it's just preposterous to think you can judge someone if you don't know those things. Even if you do, greater still are the accompanying feelings and individual differences which account for just how and why everyone experiences an "experience" as they do. If that sounds complicated, it's because it is, so stop thinking you can lay out flat lined "facts" which encompass the whole story in a cookie cutter fashion. You can't. Worry about fighting your own battle, because that's the one that deserves the bulk of your attention, and it's the one which yields the most virtuous rewards.
When you're hurt by someone's words or actions, there is a tiny ribbon you can hold in your palm, it is small and sometimes fragile, and it can be whatever color you want it to be, but what is most important is that the tiny ribbon leads to a whole spool of ribbon. That spool is your life, and there's plenty of ribbon for all your years. That's the ribbon that fits snugly around the corners of the gift box that is your existence, holding the pretty paper in place. It's also the ribbon that caresses the corners of the gift boxes you give other people just as snugly. That ribbon is patterned with all the amazing people you should intentionally surround yourself with, and further decorated by all the substance and beauty that is you. Don't ever stop giving gifts of support, of love, of compassion, and open mindedness. Remember that you are greater, and definitely happier, than someone who has to expel their own energies in an attempt to make you look or feel bad. Even if you HAVE done something bad, be great enough to own up to it, and realize that the mistakes you make are one of the greatest reservoirs of growth in your life. Don't be afraid to cut some corners of your ribbon ever now and then, either. Every experience has a lesson or two (if not fifty) packaged within it. It's like your birthday, or Christmas: you get to tear away the paper vigorously, and be really excited to keep what's inside the box forever.
To "wrap" this up, I revert back to Mrs. Roosevelt's statement by saying that you should permit your mind to be small only in the most limited amounts, for it is far too great of a mind to waste its thoughts on discussing the affairs of others. If you don't believe that for yourself, then rest assured that I believe it for you. Besides, you should be out there mingling in your own affairs, that's where you'll lose the more burdensome ideal of morality, and find all the most pleasurable indulgences.
Happy (Un)Wrapping!
-A Fabulous State
Wednesday 18 July 2012
Relation"ships": Are we as doomed as the Titanic, or will we avoid the iceberg?
The ways in which relationships (both intimate and friendly) have evolved in society is a little bit of an extreme situation to process, but maybe that's just me.
I love the this whole ideal of "YOLO" ("you only live once", for all you non-hipsters out there) but concurrently, I feel like the global shift has moved to the extreme opposite end of the spectrum, and it's a little troubling.
We're all well aware of the crippling divorce rate which functions as a little thunder cloud over the heads of couples considering taking the plunge into holy (or unholy) matrimony, but the divorce rate amoung friends and family isn't all that promising either, and herein the paradox lies!
Our grandparents lived in a society where if something presented itself as being broken, whether it be a physical object or a relationship, you fixed it, and you didn't throw it out unless you absolutely had to. Society has found it's way into treating relationships as physical commodities, items that are present to serve a purpose in tandem with an almost "pre-determined" or at least "predicted" set of circumstances. If the relationship fails to fit perfectly into those preciously envisioned experiences, then our brains are quick to hit the little panic button in our left hemisphere that says "I'm not happy, I need to get out of this, now!"
Given all the options that modern psychology has granted us (who doesn't have a therapist these days?) you'd think that we'd be lining up in droves to fight for our undying love. Here's the other problem, deciding that your love is in fact "undying" much too quickly.
I can no longer count on both hands the number of early twenty year olds I know who just can't wait to have babies, get married, and build houses with "significant" others, not necessarily in that order. Call me cynical, but statistics don't lie, and in five to seven years, I'll have all the ammo in the world to rightfully scream "I TOLD YOU SO!" from the mountain tops. Of course, I'd never do that, it's just mean, it's your life and therefore not my business, and I'm not particularly fond of mountain climbing, either. But really, are we all just THAT frightened of being alone by the time we're thirty, or am I on some drastically opposite wavelength?
Let's have a look at how we form and function within our friendships. There is great, significant value in the statement that your friends shouldn't be measured in quantity but in quality. Having gone through the quams of this particular situation quite a bit in my life (and with full understanding that I will again), I've learned that you will always know in your heart who to trust and stake value in, and who is merely an aquaintence or a short term and casual companion. Don't ever mistake one for the other. This is SO important, because whether it's an intimate relationship or a friendship, the people you give your love, trust, and support to should be deserving of it. Again, I reiterate that the most important thing you can give anybody in this life is your time. If they don't value your time as much as you do, then it's time to pluck some weeds from your garden. Remember, the concept of "time" encompasses love, trust, loyalty.
I may be a little more spiritually stanced (not in a religious sense) than some people would like, but I do place great faith in surrounding yourself with the best people for you. As my friends know, I've slipped up, and more than once at that. The lesson to be learned here is that "my friends" know I've slipped up, and they're still my friends. They supported ME always (not necessarily my bad situations), kicked my ass when I deserved it, and helped bring me back from many a disastrous circumstance, and I've done the same for them, because that's what the job entails!
At the end of the day, know who's going to walk towards someone who hurt you instead of having your back, and don't mistake some alcohol infused good times for a bond. I personally hate the term "bestie", it implies a temporary, tight "friendship" that will eventually fade. Look for your best friends in life, not your besties. Again, this is a process that should take a quite a few years to sort out, just like the process of determining a partner for life. See how they're such similar processes?
Here's where all those slightly less than informed decisions (again, friendly or intimate) compile to form a strong, empircally supported, sociological statistic: Love is a lease, so is friendship. There's such a widely accepted stance that marriage is temporary, that it's beginning to be the foundation of how we enter into one. We, as a society, are spending upwards of 45-60 thousand dollars on a marriage that, in the back of our minds, we're "okay" with settling on the strong possibility of it failing. We're entering into a union that is supposed to be honored until death, under the premise that it probably won't be. Terrifying, both for our wallets and our well being.
Of course, I'm not saying that we should abolish divorce, in a wealth of circumstances, it IS the best choice for the health of both partners, and that's just the nature of our societal beast. I am in total support of happiness and self fulfilment. What I am saying, is that there's something to be said for situations which shouldn't be treated as spontanious whims. A marriage should support the self fulfillments that you've determined for yourself, it should support the philosophies and ideals which you've taken as values in your life and a potential spouse should compliment those ideals in a very deep, and meaningful way. There is so much value in finding yourself, knowing yourself, and loving yourself before you take someone else into that equation for life. Personally, I don't think that's a decision we can make in today's world in our early twenties, and you ALL have a right to disagree with me on that point. But, whether you see yourself taking vows before some "God", or simply vows sworn in spirtual homily to each other, the significance of those vows shouldn't be taken lightly.
As another twenty something lost in these strange societal shifts, I have to admit that there was a very solid period from the age of 17 to almost 22 where I had stricken the possibility of marriage and children from the books, and my friends can attest to my strong opposition to both, but I digress. Lately, whether it's the early tickings of my biological clock, or a restored faith in genuine love and romantics, I feel like opening the window of my soul, just a tiny crack, to the possibility of both...maybe...sometime in 8 years or so. Again, for those of you who know me AND my past relationships, you're probably wondering how I of all people have a "restored" faith in love. Pick your jaw up off the keyboard, and keep reading, because I'm almost done.
That period where the utterence of "marriage" was only comparable to saying "Voldemort" in Hogwarts, was so influenced by the belief that "marriages just don't work" which was in turn fueled by all of the ones that failed largely in part because the people involved just weren't ready or compatible for it.This is both the nature of the statistic AND the fearful example of marriage that we're setting for current and future generations. Remember the days of six or seven year relationships, followed by two year engagements? I'm not suggesting that every relationship is as cookie cutter as that situation, but you get my point.
There's such a loss of respect for relationships in their early stages today, so how can you expect to hold any viable faith in a lifelong one? Intimacy and commitment just don't mean what they used to, and that's why now more than ever we need to be so careful to adjust to this new reality by making informed decisions about who we spend our lives with. Infidelity is one of the most popular items on the menu of a relationship, and if you think you're immune to the possibility that your partner or you may order up a heaping side dish of an affair, or have a slice of encounter-on-the-side for dessert, then you're immune to reality, too.
Well friends, fear not, because there is a natural (albeit scientific) guideline to help you sail through the rough waters of love and friendship. It doesn't guarantee that you'll emerge unscathed or without a scar or two (or ten), nor does it guarantee that you'll stay on the same relation"ship" forever, but it does have a little life secret to unlock for us all. Take enough time in this life to get to know yourself, and I mean REALLY get to know yourself, especially before you make imperitive decisions.
You'll grow and change for the rest of your life, but there is that time between eighteen and thirty where the waves of change are unyielding in the process of establishing some steady equilibrium.Know what's important to you (you may not ever want an equlibrium!), know what you want in someone who you'll spend the rest of your life with, make a list, even! Be totally open and honest with those you spend your time with, especially if you're planning on staying on their ship for the rest of both your lives. Don't take for granted the lessons you learned on other ships either, they're the building blocks of all the life you're living, and don't forget to spend some time alone on the water just enjoying your journey, too. One last "ship" lesson, if you're thinking of jumping ship, make sure the impending tragedy is as serious as you think it is, and give that left hemisphere some time to chill out and rationalize before you put on your life jacket and man the life boats.
Love is out there, and whether it comes in waves forever, or finds a calm in the storm of life, you deserve the very best of the love that YOU experience.
So what do you all think? Am I alone in my "I'm scared for all of us AND our relationships" point of reference, or have my immensely over-thunk-thoughts finally aligned to form some path to rationality?
You be the judge, I'm just here to inspire your thoughts!
Sincerely yours,
A Fabulous State
I love the this whole ideal of "YOLO" ("you only live once", for all you non-hipsters out there) but concurrently, I feel like the global shift has moved to the extreme opposite end of the spectrum, and it's a little troubling.
We're all well aware of the crippling divorce rate which functions as a little thunder cloud over the heads of couples considering taking the plunge into holy (or unholy) matrimony, but the divorce rate amoung friends and family isn't all that promising either, and herein the paradox lies!
Our grandparents lived in a society where if something presented itself as being broken, whether it be a physical object or a relationship, you fixed it, and you didn't throw it out unless you absolutely had to. Society has found it's way into treating relationships as physical commodities, items that are present to serve a purpose in tandem with an almost "pre-determined" or at least "predicted" set of circumstances. If the relationship fails to fit perfectly into those preciously envisioned experiences, then our brains are quick to hit the little panic button in our left hemisphere that says "I'm not happy, I need to get out of this, now!"
Given all the options that modern psychology has granted us (who doesn't have a therapist these days?) you'd think that we'd be lining up in droves to fight for our undying love. Here's the other problem, deciding that your love is in fact "undying" much too quickly.
I can no longer count on both hands the number of early twenty year olds I know who just can't wait to have babies, get married, and build houses with "significant" others, not necessarily in that order. Call me cynical, but statistics don't lie, and in five to seven years, I'll have all the ammo in the world to rightfully scream "I TOLD YOU SO!" from the mountain tops. Of course, I'd never do that, it's just mean, it's your life and therefore not my business, and I'm not particularly fond of mountain climbing, either. But really, are we all just THAT frightened of being alone by the time we're thirty, or am I on some drastically opposite wavelength?
Let's have a look at how we form and function within our friendships. There is great, significant value in the statement that your friends shouldn't be measured in quantity but in quality. Having gone through the quams of this particular situation quite a bit in my life (and with full understanding that I will again), I've learned that you will always know in your heart who to trust and stake value in, and who is merely an aquaintence or a short term and casual companion. Don't ever mistake one for the other. This is SO important, because whether it's an intimate relationship or a friendship, the people you give your love, trust, and support to should be deserving of it. Again, I reiterate that the most important thing you can give anybody in this life is your time. If they don't value your time as much as you do, then it's time to pluck some weeds from your garden. Remember, the concept of "time" encompasses love, trust, loyalty.
I may be a little more spiritually stanced (not in a religious sense) than some people would like, but I do place great faith in surrounding yourself with the best people for you. As my friends know, I've slipped up, and more than once at that. The lesson to be learned here is that "my friends" know I've slipped up, and they're still my friends. They supported ME always (not necessarily my bad situations), kicked my ass when I deserved it, and helped bring me back from many a disastrous circumstance, and I've done the same for them, because that's what the job entails!
At the end of the day, know who's going to walk towards someone who hurt you instead of having your back, and don't mistake some alcohol infused good times for a bond. I personally hate the term "bestie", it implies a temporary, tight "friendship" that will eventually fade. Look for your best friends in life, not your besties. Again, this is a process that should take a quite a few years to sort out, just like the process of determining a partner for life. See how they're such similar processes?
Here's where all those slightly less than informed decisions (again, friendly or intimate) compile to form a strong, empircally supported, sociological statistic: Love is a lease, so is friendship. There's such a widely accepted stance that marriage is temporary, that it's beginning to be the foundation of how we enter into one. We, as a society, are spending upwards of 45-60 thousand dollars on a marriage that, in the back of our minds, we're "okay" with settling on the strong possibility of it failing. We're entering into a union that is supposed to be honored until death, under the premise that it probably won't be. Terrifying, both for our wallets and our well being.
Of course, I'm not saying that we should abolish divorce, in a wealth of circumstances, it IS the best choice for the health of both partners, and that's just the nature of our societal beast. I am in total support of happiness and self fulfilment. What I am saying, is that there's something to be said for situations which shouldn't be treated as spontanious whims. A marriage should support the self fulfillments that you've determined for yourself, it should support the philosophies and ideals which you've taken as values in your life and a potential spouse should compliment those ideals in a very deep, and meaningful way. There is so much value in finding yourself, knowing yourself, and loving yourself before you take someone else into that equation for life. Personally, I don't think that's a decision we can make in today's world in our early twenties, and you ALL have a right to disagree with me on that point. But, whether you see yourself taking vows before some "God", or simply vows sworn in spirtual homily to each other, the significance of those vows shouldn't be taken lightly.
As another twenty something lost in these strange societal shifts, I have to admit that there was a very solid period from the age of 17 to almost 22 where I had stricken the possibility of marriage and children from the books, and my friends can attest to my strong opposition to both, but I digress. Lately, whether it's the early tickings of my biological clock, or a restored faith in genuine love and romantics, I feel like opening the window of my soul, just a tiny crack, to the possibility of both...maybe...sometime in 8 years or so. Again, for those of you who know me AND my past relationships, you're probably wondering how I of all people have a "restored" faith in love. Pick your jaw up off the keyboard, and keep reading, because I'm almost done.
That period where the utterence of "marriage" was only comparable to saying "Voldemort" in Hogwarts, was so influenced by the belief that "marriages just don't work" which was in turn fueled by all of the ones that failed largely in part because the people involved just weren't ready or compatible for it.This is both the nature of the statistic AND the fearful example of marriage that we're setting for current and future generations. Remember the days of six or seven year relationships, followed by two year engagements? I'm not suggesting that every relationship is as cookie cutter as that situation, but you get my point.
There's such a loss of respect for relationships in their early stages today, so how can you expect to hold any viable faith in a lifelong one? Intimacy and commitment just don't mean what they used to, and that's why now more than ever we need to be so careful to adjust to this new reality by making informed decisions about who we spend our lives with. Infidelity is one of the most popular items on the menu of a relationship, and if you think you're immune to the possibility that your partner or you may order up a heaping side dish of an affair, or have a slice of encounter-on-the-side for dessert, then you're immune to reality, too.
Well friends, fear not, because there is a natural (albeit scientific) guideline to help you sail through the rough waters of love and friendship. It doesn't guarantee that you'll emerge unscathed or without a scar or two (or ten), nor does it guarantee that you'll stay on the same relation"ship" forever, but it does have a little life secret to unlock for us all. Take enough time in this life to get to know yourself, and I mean REALLY get to know yourself, especially before you make imperitive decisions.
You'll grow and change for the rest of your life, but there is that time between eighteen and thirty where the waves of change are unyielding in the process of establishing some steady equilibrium.Know what's important to you (you may not ever want an equlibrium!), know what you want in someone who you'll spend the rest of your life with, make a list, even! Be totally open and honest with those you spend your time with, especially if you're planning on staying on their ship for the rest of both your lives. Don't take for granted the lessons you learned on other ships either, they're the building blocks of all the life you're living, and don't forget to spend some time alone on the water just enjoying your journey, too. One last "ship" lesson, if you're thinking of jumping ship, make sure the impending tragedy is as serious as you think it is, and give that left hemisphere some time to chill out and rationalize before you put on your life jacket and man the life boats.
Love is out there, and whether it comes in waves forever, or finds a calm in the storm of life, you deserve the very best of the love that YOU experience.
So what do you all think? Am I alone in my "I'm scared for all of us AND our relationships" point of reference, or have my immensely over-thunk-thoughts finally aligned to form some path to rationality?
You be the judge, I'm just here to inspire your thoughts!
Sincerely yours,
A Fabulous State
Wednesday 27 June 2012
A More Affordable Fit: Establishing a Healthy Lifestyle That Won't Leave You Broke!
Today, I read a local fitness icon's response to someone who had written him to say that they were excited to read that a program such as his existed, and that they felt a strong spark of motivation to change their own lifestyle, but that unfortunately they couldn't afford the $500 fee that the program boasts. His response sounded more detrimental than encouraging and that was disappointing to me personally, as I know a lot of friends of mine have availed of his programs and the motivational group dynamic which accompanies them. Most of these people have achieved great personal results and successes from following the basic principles of healthy nutrition and exercise which underlie all of the programming.
After highlighting and thanking the strength coach for the good work he does, the person signed off by wishing him the best of luck and by noting that if his programs could be availed of on a payment plan or more affordable basis in the future, to please let them know.
The response posted by the fitness coach unfortunately came across as having a flat bench "no money, no change" attitude. I would have to resoundingly disagree. While he did wish the writer the best of luck in their recently undertaken health transformation, by assuming the writer had a $100 cable bill, brand name clothing, and frequently ate out as fictitious, unfounded reasons why they couldn't afford his programming fee, the health coach placed himself in a less than positive category, for me at least.
As a recent university graduate who worked full time throughout my degree to afford a modest lifestyle, I know what it means to have a tight budget sometimes, and bills are necessities that simply don't pay themselves. It is only fair for me to point out that one of these bills that I've made a necessity is my Goodlife fitness gym membership which has been affordable to me personally at a rate of $25 every two weeks. However, as a bottom line, it's not unreasonable to understand that some people just wouldn't have that $500 to spare upfront.
This person wasn't implying that they weren't ready to make a healthy lifestyle change, which was the tone undertaken by the health coach in his response, in fact they were pointing out that they had started to take all of the initial steps in that direction with healthy nutrition and a weight loss. Instead of pointing toward a 10lb weight loss achievement as being temporary, I feel it should have been celebrated and encouraged especially by someone who has dedicated their life to helping others establish and maintain healthier lifestyles.
To the person who initially wrote the fitness coach, I really wish that I could ensure you read what I'm about to say, because I feel that you and many others NEED to know that you don't have to pay someone $500 to get you started on living a healthier life. The principles of nutrition and exercise that are marketed by programs such as the "Ripped" series are NOT new discoveries. This is a wealth of information that can be accessed absolutely free via websites like www.bodybuilding.com where literally ANYBODY can find a healthy diet and exercise plan, compiled by world renowned, accomplished, personal trainers/fitness models like Jamie Eason.
I personally undertook her "livefit" plan and all of it's accompanying clean nutrition, exercise, and supplementing advice to radically change my own lifestyle and become a healthier, stronger person. I'm happier mentally and physically, I've exchanged fat for lots of lean muscle, and I feel fabulous! It was one of the single best investments of time and dedication I could have ever given myself, and it's certainly a gift that keeps on giving with each workout I complete, and each goal I accomplish.
In addition to the available fitness plans, bodybuilding.com has an ENORMOUS forum full of clean eating recipes, workouts (and videos demonstrating EVERY possible exercise you could imagine), supplement information, and motivational groups where millions of members come together to help each other achieve their goals from around the globe. You can even create your own personal profile on the site, and track and share your progress with others, it really is an invaluable resource when it comes to fitness and nutrition.
Initially, of course the thought of a total transformation and all the steps that must be taken toward it are scary. Processing all the information takes awhile, as does learning the exercise routines, and learning the principles of healthy eating. Honestly though, what worthwhile, significant change, comes without a little fear and anxiety at the start? A little education never hurt any of us, especially when we undertake it ourselves. I was walking blindly when I decided to educate myself on a good fitness and nutrition lifestyle, but learning myself was an accomplishment in itself. Now, it's a lifestyle I live daily and one that I appreciate, and I'm responsible for taking it on! Little old me, all by myself! I did lots of reading, lots of writing, asked questions at the gym, and got the answers I needed. Now I'm happy to share all of these ideals with anyone who wants to learn them.
You can make revolutionary mental, emotional, and physical changes to your life if you are committed enough to educating yourself and putting in the time and effort that is required to make such changes a reality.
Of course, one thing that the website cannot give you, is the power of a physically present group dynamic which is what some people claim they need to be successful . The answer is to establish your OWN personal or group dynamic. One that suits you and keeps YOU motivated. Remember that after a month or two months of a group based program, it is still on your shoulders to keep eating nutritiously and exercising regularly to maintain and improve the results that you've worked so hard for. So whether that means you putting together a group of your own friends who are all ready for a change, tagging along and training with a friend who has already made the change and who can show you the ropes, or finding the motivation to fly solo, there is always a solution.
Finally, I need to point out that this post is in NO WAY meant to attack the "Ripped" programs or the hard work and dedication exhibited by this body transformation expert. He is doing GREAT work for the people of this city at his facility, and any program which teaches fundamental health and nutrition practices and functions to help us become a healthier population as a whole should be celebrated and commended for its undertakings and successes. He knows his stuff, and from what I can tell he's dedicated to continually learning so that he's always on top of his game in being the most informed to help his clients. If you can afford the $500 and you think the program is for you, then by all means I wish you a world of success in becoming healthier from the inside out, but if you want to save a little money, or you can't afford the fees, I want you to know that there's a very accessible and equally successful alternative available to you.
All I'm hoping to accomplish here is to let people, like the person who wrote that they couldn't afford the "Ripped" programs, know that YOU are the driving force in changing YOUR life and improving YOUR health to the standard that YOU want. We are all individuals with our accompanying differences but "where there is a will, there is a way" and YOU can find your way just like I did.
Until next time,
-A Fabulous State
After highlighting and thanking the strength coach for the good work he does, the person signed off by wishing him the best of luck and by noting that if his programs could be availed of on a payment plan or more affordable basis in the future, to please let them know.
The response posted by the fitness coach unfortunately came across as having a flat bench "no money, no change" attitude. I would have to resoundingly disagree. While he did wish the writer the best of luck in their recently undertaken health transformation, by assuming the writer had a $100 cable bill, brand name clothing, and frequently ate out as fictitious, unfounded reasons why they couldn't afford his programming fee, the health coach placed himself in a less than positive category, for me at least.
As a recent university graduate who worked full time throughout my degree to afford a modest lifestyle, I know what it means to have a tight budget sometimes, and bills are necessities that simply don't pay themselves. It is only fair for me to point out that one of these bills that I've made a necessity is my Goodlife fitness gym membership which has been affordable to me personally at a rate of $25 every two weeks. However, as a bottom line, it's not unreasonable to understand that some people just wouldn't have that $500 to spare upfront.
This person wasn't implying that they weren't ready to make a healthy lifestyle change, which was the tone undertaken by the health coach in his response, in fact they were pointing out that they had started to take all of the initial steps in that direction with healthy nutrition and a weight loss. Instead of pointing toward a 10lb weight loss achievement as being temporary, I feel it should have been celebrated and encouraged especially by someone who has dedicated their life to helping others establish and maintain healthier lifestyles.
To the person who initially wrote the fitness coach, I really wish that I could ensure you read what I'm about to say, because I feel that you and many others NEED to know that you don't have to pay someone $500 to get you started on living a healthier life. The principles of nutrition and exercise that are marketed by programs such as the "Ripped" series are NOT new discoveries. This is a wealth of information that can be accessed absolutely free via websites like www.bodybuilding.com where literally ANYBODY can find a healthy diet and exercise plan, compiled by world renowned, accomplished, personal trainers/fitness models like Jamie Eason.
I personally undertook her "livefit" plan and all of it's accompanying clean nutrition, exercise, and supplementing advice to radically change my own lifestyle and become a healthier, stronger person. I'm happier mentally and physically, I've exchanged fat for lots of lean muscle, and I feel fabulous! It was one of the single best investments of time and dedication I could have ever given myself, and it's certainly a gift that keeps on giving with each workout I complete, and each goal I accomplish.
In addition to the available fitness plans, bodybuilding.com has an ENORMOUS forum full of clean eating recipes, workouts (and videos demonstrating EVERY possible exercise you could imagine), supplement information, and motivational groups where millions of members come together to help each other achieve their goals from around the globe. You can even create your own personal profile on the site, and track and share your progress with others, it really is an invaluable resource when it comes to fitness and nutrition.
Initially, of course the thought of a total transformation and all the steps that must be taken toward it are scary. Processing all the information takes awhile, as does learning the exercise routines, and learning the principles of healthy eating. Honestly though, what worthwhile, significant change, comes without a little fear and anxiety at the start? A little education never hurt any of us, especially when we undertake it ourselves. I was walking blindly when I decided to educate myself on a good fitness and nutrition lifestyle, but learning myself was an accomplishment in itself. Now, it's a lifestyle I live daily and one that I appreciate, and I'm responsible for taking it on! Little old me, all by myself! I did lots of reading, lots of writing, asked questions at the gym, and got the answers I needed. Now I'm happy to share all of these ideals with anyone who wants to learn them.
You can make revolutionary mental, emotional, and physical changes to your life if you are committed enough to educating yourself and putting in the time and effort that is required to make such changes a reality.
Of course, one thing that the website cannot give you, is the power of a physically present group dynamic which is what some people claim they need to be successful . The answer is to establish your OWN personal or group dynamic. One that suits you and keeps YOU motivated. Remember that after a month or two months of a group based program, it is still on your shoulders to keep eating nutritiously and exercising regularly to maintain and improve the results that you've worked so hard for. So whether that means you putting together a group of your own friends who are all ready for a change, tagging along and training with a friend who has already made the change and who can show you the ropes, or finding the motivation to fly solo, there is always a solution.
Finally, I need to point out that this post is in NO WAY meant to attack the "Ripped" programs or the hard work and dedication exhibited by this body transformation expert. He is doing GREAT work for the people of this city at his facility, and any program which teaches fundamental health and nutrition practices and functions to help us become a healthier population as a whole should be celebrated and commended for its undertakings and successes. He knows his stuff, and from what I can tell he's dedicated to continually learning so that he's always on top of his game in being the most informed to help his clients. If you can afford the $500 and you think the program is for you, then by all means I wish you a world of success in becoming healthier from the inside out, but if you want to save a little money, or you can't afford the fees, I want you to know that there's a very accessible and equally successful alternative available to you.
All I'm hoping to accomplish here is to let people, like the person who wrote that they couldn't afford the "Ripped" programs, know that YOU are the driving force in changing YOUR life and improving YOUR health to the standard that YOU want. We are all individuals with our accompanying differences but "where there is a will, there is a way" and YOU can find your way just like I did.
Until next time,
-A Fabulous State
Saturday 28 April 2012
An Open Letter to Girls and Women
If you're a woman and you have managed to go through your entire life without being called a slut, I would like to meet you. The same goes for the companion terms: whore, bitch, skank, hoe etc. I think you get the picture. While the official terminology dates a much earlier period in the history of human existence, one that many of us aren't aware of, such words have been thriving in their evolution within our world. Unfortunately, we have not updated our definitions to reflect the scale upon which they are used today.
Media is absolutely saturated with these words, and they're being uttered by children not old enough to have even heard the terms cross their innocent ears let alone understand what they mean. If there is any such thing as utilizing such heinous terms "correctly", then we as a society have enormously overlooked how.
Reality television has probably been the most significant culprit in propagating the "okay" standard in referring to women in this manner. While I was watching a certain television show and browsing through the internet in general, and Facebook, it really hit home just how dire of a state we've placed the lives of young girls in.
Anything from what you wear, to who you name your friends, to how you conduct yourself intimately or otherwise can earn you the title of being a slut or a whore. On the opposite end of the spectrum, behaving in the "socially accepted" realm of these same categories can still land you on the list. How exactly does a woman win the battle of being referred to in a positive capacity?
The way we've learned to use our vocabulary when it comes to this category, is nothing short of dangerous. Some may be tempted to blame parents, but the reality is that the amount of stimuli a child or adult encounters in the run of a singular day has become so enormous that as a parent or an individual you simply can't filter everything that is experienced. Psychologically, our natural response to this wealth of stimuli is hierarchical, and we categorize and stereotype as a necessary element in our human nature. The paradox lies within HOW we categorize.
While watching an episode of a new MTV series entitled "Savage U" hosted by sex columnist, Dan Savage, one young college girl stood up to ask Dan "If I wear a skimpy outfit is it slutty? And if I make out with a guy at a party, does that make me a slut?" Savage's response was that "Yeah, you might look slutty with that outfit, but who cares? And yeah, some guys might call you a slut, but just don't make out with those ones." He went on to say that girls are not giving it up, they're taking it back (in regard to intimacy). At a first glance it may be unclear what Savage was trying to say, but when you listened further to his response, what he had to communicate was a revolutionary idea in itself. Basically, Savage explained that young women should essentially "take back" the word slut, and start using it in a positive and liberating way. He was saying that there's nothing wrong with a woman taking control of and deciding her own sexual experiences. His idea was that if women everywhere, especially those at college campuses and high schools began using the term in this way, that in time the meaning itself would change, and "Slut" wouldn't be a label to fear, but one to embrace. I have to say that I agree.
We all like to look good. Especially when we go out. Guys gel their hair, wear their favorite hats, new shirts, etc. and girls do their hair and makeup and put on a sexy outfit. Does that transform you into someone who should be labeled and judged? Of course not, but the reality is that's exactly what's happening. Maybe as women, we need to laugh with our girlfriends and decide unanimously that "We're going to look slutty as HELL tonight and we're going to feel good about how confident we are in ourselves!" instead of deciding that it's okay for some guy at a party to label us in a derogatory manner. The age old rule stands, that if a man hooks up with girls (note the plurality), it's great, but if a girl does the same, she's a whore. It's sickening.
You don't need to fulfill anybody else's idea of what you "should" be. Your moral codes and values are established by you and you have every right, within any reasonable measure, to be and do exactly what (or who) for that matter, you want.
I'm not condoning the idea of disrespecting your body or your intelligence through sex or any other medium, but what I am saying is that you should never feel like you've done something "wrong" for growing up, having experiences, and in turn making the mistakes and subsequently having the accomplishments that will shape the beautiful woman you will become. Nobody has the right to flaw that process for you and nothing has ever been so much a part of "life" as becoming comfortable with yourself, who you are, and what you like or dislike. These are all characteristics you determine for yourself, and that entire flowering of YOURSELF should never be jeopardized or restricted by anybody.
I'm just on the cusp of 22, but I can't even begin to imagine having to start fresh from childhood and grow up in the world as it is now. When I see what young boys and girls are watching on television, reading on the internet, or how they are learning to interact with each other, it's a totally different world from the one I lived in as a teenager. When I see something like Jersey Shore, which is a guilty pleasure for many of us, and I really think about it...I imagine how I would NEVER let my son or daughter watch it with my consent. That's not to say they wouldn't find another way to absorb the same ideals, but allowing it? Never.
I'm not a parent yet, but I do believe as a young woman that the best thing to tell parents is to teach your daughters AND your sons to be respectful of themselves, their bodies, their personalities, and to exhibit mannerisms that are respectful towards others. Teach your children to love themselves and be proud of everything they accomplish and to embrace the entire process of getting older and learning about themselves. Instead of fighting the losing battle of shielding them from all the negative, acknowledge it's existence, but exhibit positive examples of how they can conduct themselves differently. Teach them right and wrong if such a thing still exists, because I've never seen anything so distorted and wrong in this world as the way I see women being referred to in the media and in their own lives, and subsequently the way I see young men and women embracing these derogatory ideals.
As a girl or a woman you need to understand that no real man will EVER call you those things. No self respecting, decent MAN will EVER refer to you like that. If he does, then he isn't one, plain and simple. And further to this, he is not worth even one precious second of your beautiful life. As a very wise woman told me, there is NEVER an excuse for what is unacceptable, SELF RESPECT, ALWAYS.
If I could choose one timeless lesson that came from my catholic upbringing, it is that you "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you". A dear friend recently said "The most precious gift you can give someone is your time" and if they don't respect and appreciate that time, then there needs to be discipline, and they need to be cut from your life. You only get one shot. This is not only true of intimate relationships, but friendships and all others as well. You need to love and respect yourself before you can do the same for someone else. Love starts with yourself.
As a concluding statement to this rather long winded piece, the sad part is, almost all of us, as women, will have at least one asshole that takes some piece of yourself away from you with nasty words at some time in your life. They're out there, and chances are one will come along. The same is true vise versa for guys, even though this post has been directed toward the ladies. No matter how much you've invested into a relationship of any kind, and regardless of how much you love and care about someone, if it's abusive or unhealthy then you need to put yourself first. You need to remember, as you grow and learn, that you literally have your entire life ahead of you, a completely open road where you draw the map. It is yours, and nobody else's. When you make the decision to take somebody down that road with you, they should be worthy of having that place at your side, and in your life.
Signing off somberly,
Jessica.
Media is absolutely saturated with these words, and they're being uttered by children not old enough to have even heard the terms cross their innocent ears let alone understand what they mean. If there is any such thing as utilizing such heinous terms "correctly", then we as a society have enormously overlooked how.
Reality television has probably been the most significant culprit in propagating the "okay" standard in referring to women in this manner. While I was watching a certain television show and browsing through the internet in general, and Facebook, it really hit home just how dire of a state we've placed the lives of young girls in.
Anything from what you wear, to who you name your friends, to how you conduct yourself intimately or otherwise can earn you the title of being a slut or a whore. On the opposite end of the spectrum, behaving in the "socially accepted" realm of these same categories can still land you on the list. How exactly does a woman win the battle of being referred to in a positive capacity?
The way we've learned to use our vocabulary when it comes to this category, is nothing short of dangerous. Some may be tempted to blame parents, but the reality is that the amount of stimuli a child or adult encounters in the run of a singular day has become so enormous that as a parent or an individual you simply can't filter everything that is experienced. Psychologically, our natural response to this wealth of stimuli is hierarchical, and we categorize and stereotype as a necessary element in our human nature. The paradox lies within HOW we categorize.
While watching an episode of a new MTV series entitled "Savage U" hosted by sex columnist, Dan Savage, one young college girl stood up to ask Dan "If I wear a skimpy outfit is it slutty? And if I make out with a guy at a party, does that make me a slut?" Savage's response was that "Yeah, you might look slutty with that outfit, but who cares? And yeah, some guys might call you a slut, but just don't make out with those ones." He went on to say that girls are not giving it up, they're taking it back (in regard to intimacy). At a first glance it may be unclear what Savage was trying to say, but when you listened further to his response, what he had to communicate was a revolutionary idea in itself. Basically, Savage explained that young women should essentially "take back" the word slut, and start using it in a positive and liberating way. He was saying that there's nothing wrong with a woman taking control of and deciding her own sexual experiences. His idea was that if women everywhere, especially those at college campuses and high schools began using the term in this way, that in time the meaning itself would change, and "Slut" wouldn't be a label to fear, but one to embrace. I have to say that I agree.
We all like to look good. Especially when we go out. Guys gel their hair, wear their favorite hats, new shirts, etc. and girls do their hair and makeup and put on a sexy outfit. Does that transform you into someone who should be labeled and judged? Of course not, but the reality is that's exactly what's happening. Maybe as women, we need to laugh with our girlfriends and decide unanimously that "We're going to look slutty as HELL tonight and we're going to feel good about how confident we are in ourselves!" instead of deciding that it's okay for some guy at a party to label us in a derogatory manner. The age old rule stands, that if a man hooks up with girls (note the plurality), it's great, but if a girl does the same, she's a whore. It's sickening.
You don't need to fulfill anybody else's idea of what you "should" be. Your moral codes and values are established by you and you have every right, within any reasonable measure, to be and do exactly what (or who) for that matter, you want.
I'm not condoning the idea of disrespecting your body or your intelligence through sex or any other medium, but what I am saying is that you should never feel like you've done something "wrong" for growing up, having experiences, and in turn making the mistakes and subsequently having the accomplishments that will shape the beautiful woman you will become. Nobody has the right to flaw that process for you and nothing has ever been so much a part of "life" as becoming comfortable with yourself, who you are, and what you like or dislike. These are all characteristics you determine for yourself, and that entire flowering of YOURSELF should never be jeopardized or restricted by anybody.
I'm just on the cusp of 22, but I can't even begin to imagine having to start fresh from childhood and grow up in the world as it is now. When I see what young boys and girls are watching on television, reading on the internet, or how they are learning to interact with each other, it's a totally different world from the one I lived in as a teenager. When I see something like Jersey Shore, which is a guilty pleasure for many of us, and I really think about it...I imagine how I would NEVER let my son or daughter watch it with my consent. That's not to say they wouldn't find another way to absorb the same ideals, but allowing it? Never.
I'm not a parent yet, but I do believe as a young woman that the best thing to tell parents is to teach your daughters AND your sons to be respectful of themselves, their bodies, their personalities, and to exhibit mannerisms that are respectful towards others. Teach your children to love themselves and be proud of everything they accomplish and to embrace the entire process of getting older and learning about themselves. Instead of fighting the losing battle of shielding them from all the negative, acknowledge it's existence, but exhibit positive examples of how they can conduct themselves differently. Teach them right and wrong if such a thing still exists, because I've never seen anything so distorted and wrong in this world as the way I see women being referred to in the media and in their own lives, and subsequently the way I see young men and women embracing these derogatory ideals.
As a girl or a woman you need to understand that no real man will EVER call you those things. No self respecting, decent MAN will EVER refer to you like that. If he does, then he isn't one, plain and simple. And further to this, he is not worth even one precious second of your beautiful life. As a very wise woman told me, there is NEVER an excuse for what is unacceptable, SELF RESPECT, ALWAYS.
If I could choose one timeless lesson that came from my catholic upbringing, it is that you "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you". A dear friend recently said "The most precious gift you can give someone is your time" and if they don't respect and appreciate that time, then there needs to be discipline, and they need to be cut from your life. You only get one shot. This is not only true of intimate relationships, but friendships and all others as well. You need to love and respect yourself before you can do the same for someone else. Love starts with yourself.
As a concluding statement to this rather long winded piece, the sad part is, almost all of us, as women, will have at least one asshole that takes some piece of yourself away from you with nasty words at some time in your life. They're out there, and chances are one will come along. The same is true vise versa for guys, even though this post has been directed toward the ladies. No matter how much you've invested into a relationship of any kind, and regardless of how much you love and care about someone, if it's abusive or unhealthy then you need to put yourself first. You need to remember, as you grow and learn, that you literally have your entire life ahead of you, a completely open road where you draw the map. It is yours, and nobody else's. When you make the decision to take somebody down that road with you, they should be worthy of having that place at your side, and in your life.
Signing off somberly,
Jessica.
Tuesday 21 February 2012
Pancake Day for Agnes
Agnes my dear, when ya gets the clothes out on the line come over till' I tells ya the latest scandal! WELL, Cecil's wife Marie was down to the post office there this morning,and wearin' that big Jesus fur coat what was sent up from New York there last summer, you knows now that never came out of the barrel! Anyway girl she was telling' me right proud then about what young Tish bit into in the pancake this morning, and wouldn't ya know now 'twas a key to the brand new car! Money rainin' off the trees over there! Then again, you can be sure now dat' was bought outta' the old woman's money! Sure Cecil was all she had, you knows he got the works when she passed on, God rest her soul. She did more prayin' the day she was born than that Marie done in a lifetime! Anyway, one of them Smart cars they calls em', das' what she got! Well, what in the name of the good lord and savior is smart about that!? The wheels on it sure they're no bigger now than what comes on the youngsters pedal bikes! "Made for two" is what they writes on the back of it. Two! Can you imagine now if we had to pile the 18 of our crowd in that now to go over the road for a few groceries? My dear Agnes, they're just not practical a'tall these days! Then again with all that money they got to burn, I hope they knows now they can't buy themselves into the good lord's kingdom when they goes, no the good lord only see's prayers and devotion now, and not the dollar sign! Sure remember now on pancake day when we were young how delighted we'd be from findin' an ol' penny now or granmudder's ring (and sure we had to give that back!) so they could say we'd end up married or rich? Well I'll tell ya one thing, that Cecil and Marie must have swallowed some mouthful of coppers in their day to have the money they got over there now! Anyway Agnes girl tis' all pure gluttney now das' all it is, somethin' for to make me have to put off me cuppa' tea to go sayin' a litney of rosaries and prayers here this morning. I dear say a pancake will never cross me lips this day! And honest to God how much do I love a nice pancake wit' a bitta molasses over the top of it, oh the taste! But that's it Agnes girl, when you're tryin' to stop half what's around from burnin' in an eternity of damnation! Sometimes I thinks tis' only me and fadder Lundrigan that cares where everyone ends up to! Are they all ever goin' t' give up this sinnin' racket so I can enjoy me last few life's pleasures before the holy father himself calls me home? Sure when St.Peter meets me at the gates girl I'll be dat' Jesus tired I won't be able to answer not the one of his questions for me! Oh my, oh my I feels right overcome with all the worry girl, spose I goes in now and gets on me knees and prays for the likes of that Marie and Cecil, and oh Christ yes for young Tish too because as sure as there's capelin on the beaches in June, there'll be nothing smart about what'll happen to her if a gale of wind blows over the barrons now when she's goin' across em' in that boot box! I'll be talkin' to ya after Agnes girl, the work of the heavenly father sure tis' never done. |
Saturday 14 January 2012
Is there anything "NEW" about this year?
Now that all the champagne has been poured, the gifts opened, and we've all had our fair share of debating the appropriateness of saying "Merry Christmas", the holiday bills are adorning the mailboxes of North Americans everywhere and our planet is still in a tipsy state of affairs.
The remains of the Arab Spring of 2011 are still acting upon Global affairs in full force. The revolution that was so sought after by Egyptians now leaves them with an iron fist military rule which continues to lead to country in the opposite direction of democracy and Syria still finds itself in an uprisen state of violence, oppression, and danger for all of it's citizens.
Another sad circumstance is the European crisis, which sees the most magnificent continent on our planet desperate to formulate some manageable EU strategy to hold things together.
America has managed to spent it's way into oblivion with no effective means of reducing it's gargantuan debt and if the trend continues, the entire world will fall into the same hopeless pit. Another disturbing and shockingly TELEVISED occurrence is that of U.S election campaign advertisements, one of which directly states "I believe that marriage is a union between one man and one woman only". WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE? And more importantly, who ELECTS these people? Why isn't bigotry as dead as Bin Laden?
"Occupy Wall Street" protesters have moved under the radar and continue to be shunned by the media, although they are the most admirable mentions thus far, because it's true that an idea cannot be occupied and someday their perspective will bring us great change, I'm sure of it.
Of course, let's not forget that on the home front Steven Harper's Conservative government continues to prove that they're about as intelligent as the man who thought "people would tire of looking at a stationary box" when the television was invented. Canadians are speaking out (but not really) against the ridiculous copyright act and tougher crime laws implemented with minimal sentencing (just to name a couple of key issues). And we're stuck with this, for four years. I certainly hope we're immeasurably pissed off enough by the end of these four years to elect some kind of change into our strong, proud nation, and more importantly, that the change we'll be looking for is available on our voting ballots.
Is there ANYTHING really "New" about this year?!!
SO, am I an eternal pessimist, a somewhat off center realist, or am I just a hater? Well, I'm actually quite the opposite. Amongst all the turmoil and trouble that this great big world is buried beneath, there are more than a few bright lights that can lead us home. There are some pretty brilliant human beings out there (some of which, like myself, are buried under 30k + in student debt) just waiting to share their ideas and perspectives with the rest of our planet. There are innovative, inspiring individuals all around us and I think our best tool heading into this "new" year is to connect and collaborate with each other; be inspired by and learn from all those around us in conjunction with our own outlooks and ideals to turn this mother ship around and head it back toward some kind of peaceful, manageable existence. Go ahead and send that e mail to your MP, apply for that conference, attend that protest, and let your powerful voices be heard.
This January when you shake hands and exchange hugs with friends, colleagues, and strangers, make sure that your "Happy New Year!" greeting really counts, and spread good, positive, ideas, love, and energy with all you encounter.
Like those holiday credit card bills, it'll take time to pay off our worldly debts and end less than optimistic circumstances, but if we cling to our hopes and dreams with every ounce of our beings, we just might breathe a sigh of relief someday and be a 6 billion people who are living a life that's 'livable" again.
All the love in the world to you, planet earth! Make this one count!
-Jess
The remains of the Arab Spring of 2011 are still acting upon Global affairs in full force. The revolution that was so sought after by Egyptians now leaves them with an iron fist military rule which continues to lead to country in the opposite direction of democracy and Syria still finds itself in an uprisen state of violence, oppression, and danger for all of it's citizens.
Another sad circumstance is the European crisis, which sees the most magnificent continent on our planet desperate to formulate some manageable EU strategy to hold things together.
America has managed to spent it's way into oblivion with no effective means of reducing it's gargantuan debt and if the trend continues, the entire world will fall into the same hopeless pit. Another disturbing and shockingly TELEVISED occurrence is that of U.S election campaign advertisements, one of which directly states "I believe that marriage is a union between one man and one woman only". WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE? And more importantly, who ELECTS these people? Why isn't bigotry as dead as Bin Laden?
"Occupy Wall Street" protesters have moved under the radar and continue to be shunned by the media, although they are the most admirable mentions thus far, because it's true that an idea cannot be occupied and someday their perspective will bring us great change, I'm sure of it.
Of course, let's not forget that on the home front Steven Harper's Conservative government continues to prove that they're about as intelligent as the man who thought "people would tire of looking at a stationary box" when the television was invented. Canadians are speaking out (but not really) against the ridiculous copyright act and tougher crime laws implemented with minimal sentencing (just to name a couple of key issues). And we're stuck with this, for four years. I certainly hope we're immeasurably pissed off enough by the end of these four years to elect some kind of change into our strong, proud nation, and more importantly, that the change we'll be looking for is available on our voting ballots.
Is there ANYTHING really "New" about this year?!!
SO, am I an eternal pessimist, a somewhat off center realist, or am I just a hater? Well, I'm actually quite the opposite. Amongst all the turmoil and trouble that this great big world is buried beneath, there are more than a few bright lights that can lead us home. There are some pretty brilliant human beings out there (some of which, like myself, are buried under 30k + in student debt) just waiting to share their ideas and perspectives with the rest of our planet. There are innovative, inspiring individuals all around us and I think our best tool heading into this "new" year is to connect and collaborate with each other; be inspired by and learn from all those around us in conjunction with our own outlooks and ideals to turn this mother ship around and head it back toward some kind of peaceful, manageable existence. Go ahead and send that e mail to your MP, apply for that conference, attend that protest, and let your powerful voices be heard.
This January when you shake hands and exchange hugs with friends, colleagues, and strangers, make sure that your "Happy New Year!" greeting really counts, and spread good, positive, ideas, love, and energy with all you encounter.
Like those holiday credit card bills, it'll take time to pay off our worldly debts and end less than optimistic circumstances, but if we cling to our hopes and dreams with every ounce of our beings, we just might breathe a sigh of relief someday and be a 6 billion people who are living a life that's 'livable" again.
All the love in the world to you, planet earth! Make this one count!
-Jess
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